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Keseharian,
Opinion
- Asep Haryono | A Telegram Encounter a Lesson to me About Online Safety - Powered by Blogger
Summary of my post today
Recently, I met a young girl on Telegram who asked for something heartbreaking she wanted me to find someone or family for her to be adopted in another country. Her message touched me deeply, but it also made me realize the serious risks of these kinds of online requests. In this post, I share my personal experience, what I learned, and how we can all respond with care and responsibility.
My fellow bloggers A few days ago, something unexpected happened to me on Telegram (instead of my other social media platforms such as Linkedin, Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp).. I met a girl probably around 17 years old who said she lived somewhere in Europe. At first, it felt like just another random online connection, but then she opened up and told me something that really caught me off guard.
She said she was looking for someone in the United States, Canada, Australia, or any European country to adopt her. She told me she was struggling in life, and it was clear she wanted a fresh start or a way out of her current situation. Her message wasn’t rude or pushy just sincere, maybe even desperate. And it really made me pause.
I believed she was a real person, not a bot or scammer. Her messages didn’t feel fake. But still, I started asking myself: How can I help someone like this? Is it even my place? What if this is dangerous for her or even for me?
I’ll be honest: I didn’t have all the answers. But I knew that this wasn’t something I could or should handle alone. Adoption, especially international adoption, is a serious and highly legal process not something that happens through social media. There are laws, background checks, paperwork, and government approvals involved. It’s not like finding someone a host family or a roommate.
More than that, this kind of request online raises red flags. What if someone is manipulating her? What if this is a trafficking risk or a scam designed to play on people’s emotions? Even if she’s truly in need, trying to match her with a stranger online is not only unsafe it could be illegal.
That’s when I took a step back and looked for a responsible way to help. Instead of jumping in as a “hero,” I decided to gently encourage her to reach out to real support systems in her country.
I sent her a message explaining that she should talk to local social services, a school counselor, or one of the big international organizations like UNICEF, Save the Children, or SOS Children’s Villages. These groups are trained to handle difficult family or personal situations and can connect her with legal, emotional, or even housing support if needed.
I told her that I cared, but I also reminded her that real help starts with people nearby not strangers online, no matter how kind they may seem.
This experience opened my eyes. We all want to help when someone reaches out, especially if we have good hearts. But sometimes, the most responsible thing we can do is not to get directly involved instead, to guide people toward the help that is safe, legal, and built to protect them.
But my safest and wisest move is not to get personally involved in trying to find her an adoptive family. Instead, encourage her to seek help locally or through the proper global agencies I’ve mentioned for her" . .
If you ever encounter something like this,
I hope my story helps you navigate it wisely. You can care deeply without crossing risky lines. Sometimes, pointing someone in the right direction is the best kind of help you can give..
A Message From Asep Haryono
"Thank you so much for your time here. I really appreciate your precious moment here as well. Please leave any comment down below. Let me hear from you. Greetings from Indonesia"
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